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31 days of festive-ass flicks, day six: scrooged

Wednesday night marked the first scheduling chance in the 31 Days of Festive-Ass Flicks calendar where I subbed in Scrooged for Elf because I hadn’t realized how early I had Elf set. It’s one of my favorites, it has to be saved! [Here is the update calendar for your viewing pleasure.]

Scrooged is a real good movie. I have a lot of memories of watching it as a kid because it is LEGITIMATELY terrifying and is responsible for one of my most inane fears (moving skeletons! DON’T LIKE ‘EM ONE BIT.) and also I had a lot of youthful lesbian feelings toward Carol Kane.

This is one of those movies that makes me feel intense desires about New York. (See also: Elf, Annie Hall, Ghostbusters, Big, Working Girl, Hackers, The First Wives Club, 13 Going on 30, and 30 Rock.) It’s like… if it was always Christmas in NYC and the snow wasn’t slippery and I had a good warm wardrobe I would totally want to live there. If it was always safe-snowy and beautiful and covered in elaborate light and window displays, I would totally, totally be down.

ANYWAY, Scrooged is great. Bill Murray is great. Carol Kane is great. Karen Allen is great. Bobcat Goldthwait is, as always, flawless and ridiculous. IT IS ALL GOOD. And the story still feels really relevant/current. And the dated stuff is delightful. VHS! The clothes! Network television being relevant and popular! It also screams 80s because there’s no real vilification of Frank’s wealth, just his shitty behavior. And that’s pretty interesting.

I also think it’s really weird that we’re supposed to be mad at Frank for ditching Christmas Eve dinner with his friends in the flashback-y region of the movie. Like, friends are the most important thing in my life. My friends and family are one in the same to me. But if an opportunity that would facilitate my achieving something important to me arose and I had to cancel plans in order to do it, my friends and family would EASILY understand. That whole exchange is really awkward actually. I think the “Let’s take a break” thing is supposed to communicate to the viewer that Frank’s job has put a strain on their relationship already, but it just comes off like Karen Allen has some serious issues. IT’S ONE DINNER, DANG. Or it’s a sign that the AMC TV version edited out some really important character stuff. There are just so many better reasons to think Frank’s a dick and that one isn’t a very good precursor to them.

But yeah, I want to talk about how I don’t understand why there aren’t a whole bunch of people my age with extreme trauma from watching this thing. THIS MOVIE IS TERRIFYING.

And if that isn’t bad enough:

At the end they are holding gifts and bells and shit! WHAT WEIRDO DECIDED THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA?!

ANYWAY, Scrooged is an excellent, relevant, hilarious, dark, and delightful holiday ROMP. Or something.