September 2024 will not be going down in the books as one of the best I have ever lived, but it hath brought me FALLOWEEN as it always does and some pretty alright stuff, so let’s talk about that and forget that I am Mentally Unwell.
I made a kind of middle of the night unhinged Amazon order because I was out of flossers and every single different kind of flosser I tried is just absolutely garbage? I grew up using Plackers because my dad always had them in the car for tooth emergencies and they were the go-to for years, but now they’re awful? The quality is so bad and if I am going to do something I hate for the environment I would at least like them to successfully floss my teeth. All the Oral-B ones are bad too? Like either they shred or they have that weird plastic tape floss that I promise your hygienest does not want you to be using because it’s useless. But! A year or two ago, we were in the Cities and Crystal placed a Target delivery order for drinks etc, and I was like, “oh I forgot flossers, can you grab some?” and she bought me these baby child infant flossers and while initially I didn’t like them, I now love them because the floss is thick and makes it easy to work between my teeth without shredding but then after like two years of being able to get them reliably they’ve been discontinued or something? ANYWAY, I found a seller on Amazon who had four 90 packs for what was actually what I paid at Target per flosser and I ordered five four packs. Which is basically five years worth of flossers so I guess I have to stay alive that long now? Which is a little stressful but not the worst reason I guess.
We bought some expensive fans earlier this year that we’ve now been using long enough to have an opinion about. This one is great, suuuuuper quiet but also really moves air around a space, and this one is also great though not better enough that I would buy it instead of the slightly cheaper again. This one is my biggest disappointment — the fan itself is quiet and it moves air great and it’s not the ugliest thing in the world, but just long enough after buying it that we couldn’t return it it started making a real weird noise when it oscillates and I know I should reach out to the company but like… Do you know how hard that stuff is? Like, man. I’ll probably stop being a lazy piece of shit about it eventually, but sheesh. ANYWAY, they’re some of the nicest looking fans I’ve seen in a while and the remotes are nice and I’m sure it would be great to use the wifi also actually, but since the app’s TOS is basically like, “We will give your information to cops no questions asked :) ” I will simply not ever be learning anything about that.
We also, finally, after eight years of suffering our old, poorly hung, drafty, shitty front and back doors, bit the bullet and bought new ones and had a professional hang them and they’re incredible. Not only are they not drafty! They also open and close without me having to push, pull, or bang my arm into them (depending on the season)! And also they’re very beautiful because I have great taste! I feel bad because our back door used to have a full length window and Bruno would spend his days standing there trying to see out (which he could not as we put light refracting film AND a dark curtain on it as soon as we moved in because the sun was UNBEARABLE in the afternoons) and now it only has a half window because I am cheap and also because I didn’t actually want him to spend his whole day there barking, but that’s not going to stop me from feeling bad, babey! We were also finally able to get a storm door with a retractable screen put in and I cannot wait to actually open it and have air moving around the back of the house for the first time since we moved in! What a time to be alive!
Alright, I guess that’s it? What a weird old person list of things I liked… I also watched Stop Making Sense which I have not seen recently enough to have a strong feeling about whether the restoration/transfer is good, but GOSH what a fucking movie. What a concert! What a band! What an experience! Also the tribute album is pretty good! Or at least has a few bangers!
Oh and I also liked Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves! What a fun movie! What a great bunch of characters! What an incredible bunch of creatures! Everyone in this was so charming and so fun to watch, I wish I’d been able to see it in theaters which I don’t often think anymore even though we used to go to the movies like twice a week but can’t because our theater here isn’t usable for fat people and also because I think if someone whipped their phone out during a movie I would rip it out of their hand and throw it all the way to hell. What the fuck happened to the world, man?
Okay, that’s it! I’m old! Happy Falloween! Better days are coming! Unless you’re a summer person and then well I guess I am very sorry and I hope you find peace anyway.
