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31 days of festive-ass flicks, day 27: die hard

Day 27 of 31 Days of Festive-Ass Flicks [CALENDAR] was Die Hard which I had NEVER BEFORE SEEN! Shock! Gasp! Horror!

I didn’t want to watch Die Hard. Not at all. I had gone almost 27 years without ever watching it and I was pretty okay with going the rest of my life without it. But my girlfriend was like, “Dude, it’s good” and “Dude, it’s a holiday tradition” and “Dude, ALAN RICKMAN.” And so finally I caved, like I do to most things, so she would shuuuuuut up about it already.

And we watched it! And there was lots of explosions! And it was pretty funny! And Alan Rickman is so hot and so great. And Bruce Willis was SUCH a babe. And it was good! And I   [more…]

31 days of festive-ass flicks, day 26: eight crazy nights

Movie number 26 of 31 Days of Festive-Ass Flicks [CALENDAR] was Eight Crazy Nights which I have seen a million times and is great and terrible and always reminds me of one of my best friends.

I have no notes on this one. It’s sort of an… either you can tolerate/like Adam Sandler movies or you can’t kind of thing. And I can. I love Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore and Big Daddy and this one falls right in there. Douchebag with a heart gets redeemed. Douchebag is Adam Sandler. Adam Sandler is annoying-ish. And in this one there are songs! Pretty good ones, honestly. I sing “that’s a technical fooooooul” more than probably necessary in anyone’s life.

There is lots of heinous/problematic stuff including racism, transphobia, homophobia, fat-shaming,   [more…]

31 days of festive-ass flicks, day 25: nutcracker - the motion picture

Movie number 25 of the 31 Days of Festive-Ass Flicks [CALENDAR] was Nutcracker: The Motion Picture and dear god ballet is so boring this barely kept me conscious. Also, I accidentally watched it out of order, but am posting it in the correct place DEAL WITH IT.

The thing is, I watched this movie because it reminds me of first grade. Because my first grade teacher asked us if anyone had a copy of any version of The Nutcracker and I was like, “I DO” except I was LYING which was a thing I did so people would like me and she was like, “Great! CAN YOU BRING IT IN TOMORROW?!” because it was the last day before Christmas break and she wanted us to have a video day.   [more…]

31 days of festive-ass flicks, day 24: trading places

YOU GUYS, tonight I actually managed to finish watching all of the movies for 31 Days of Festive-Ass Flicks [CALENDAR] and I have never felt so FREE. I don’t EVER have to watch a holiday movie again if I don’t want to! I AM DONE. Now I just have to write eight more posts. CRIES. Starting with this one.

Movie number 24 was Trading Places which, despite my love of 80s movies, I had managed to never see.

I really liked it. And I laughed a lot. And I cringed a lot. And I reignited my passion for Jamie Lee Curtis a lot. And it was funny and good and enjoyable and nicely set into a holiday tradition of dark humor and capitalist critique.

This is another one where   [more…]

31 days of festive-ass flicks, day 23: this christmas

Day 23 of the 31 Days of Festive-Ass Flicks [CALENDAR] was This Christmas which I have seen before and already loved a lot even though it contains that stupid, violent, abusive, misogynistic piece of shit Chris Brown. [Spoilers, probably.]

I don’t have a lot to say about this movie because I just like it. It’s just one of those movies that is on tv a lot and I sit through it and I laugh and I feel very pleased and warm when it’s over. I love movies about families and I love movies about “dysfunctional” families — aka families that are at least partially realistic/have issues/kind of resemble mine sometimes — even more because love through hardship is NOT EASY and it’s important. Loving in a happy family is   [more…]