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face off, “alice in zombieland”

I was going to stop recapping Face Off because it was sort of killing my will to live and also my girlfriend just started her new job, so we’re still working out the kinks in time management and I obviously can’t watch this thing without her, since it’s her fault ENTIRELY that I ever watched it in the first place, so that meant we didn’t actually watch it until yesterday morning. But. Here we are.

This week on Face Off

I’m making it short and sweet — literally this time, since the last time I said that it really wasn’t short or sweet. Here’s a sonnet!

Wonderland zombies,
Is that all you got?
It’s episode four
And you’re scraping the pot.

Jason was safe ’cause Laila Ali,
Young Nicole’s Alice was embarrassing,
and ol’ Cowboy Roy, his Queen without folly,
Tightly to his win, forever he’ll cling.

Alana was manic, wagging her tail;
Tommy, he killed a great concept with fail;
Sara was nervous and lost without sail;
Laura was solid, but surprised as hell.

This week on Face Off it could’ve been great,
Maybe next week we should instead masturbate.